It’s not true what they say about the rain in Spain. Fact is, the rain in Spain falls not only on the plain, but also occasionally on a bunch of dusty but happy Burners who’re to be found in a dry valley in the Monegros desert. There, in the middle of nowhere, far from anywhere there’s a European burn – Nowhere – where Burners do what they do best.

Held every year in July, Nowhere features the same creative spirit and wild shenanigans that mark any Burner event. Held on private farmland in the Castejon de Monegros area, the site features lots of barrios (neighbourhoods), camps, sound systems, artworks and mobile rigs. Among the sound camps are the top-class The Garden (an Italian camp which featured a kickass Funktion-One system), Ubertown, the Raidiots and Never Never Learn. On the move were a few mobile sound rigs such as Suck My Rock (a pirate ship), a ghetto-blaster-covered cruiser and a mobile lounge. Amongst these rigs there’s quite a bit of friendly rivalry and ganging up against static dance floors for a laugh – such as when Ubertown blew one too many speakers.

And damn, there were some great theme camps – Cathode Ray Mission played a fine selection of bizarre, avant-garde and downright weird flicks and animation clips. Touch & Play explored sensual pleasures; Camp Babycham featured Coffee & Classics at 10 every morning (they also put on a great cabaret on the Friday night and hosted a Penis Appreciation session). Costume Camp got you dolled up and provided a catwalk for you to strut on, Paradishamac was (as its name suggests) a paradise of hammocks and there loads of other activities and interesting gatherings to participate in. Artwork also features prominently, with a range of creations dotting the central lower area of the slope.

But what was it like? Hell, what’s any burn like? It was great! The people were fantastic – as welcoming and witty as anywhere, and always up for a laugh. As a general rule the age of participants was a little younger than at AfrikaBurn, and as a result of the layout of the site being smaller than AfrikaBurners might be used to, there aren’t the wide open spaces or the same amount of art cars or bikes cruising around, but on the whole it was a lot of fun and a damn fine time was had by all.

And just who exactly was the ‘all’ as far as your AfrikaBurn Ambassadors went? None less than the horned king of DPW and his gold-tiara-wearing Queen, the editor and typing pool mistress of The No Spectator (who produced a newspaper on site as they do at AfrikaBurn), and one Tristan Lang of the upcountry JoziBurner contingent.

Moral of the story? If you get the chance to go to Nowhere, do it!

Want to know more about Nowhere? Visit www.goingnowhere.org

Words and photos: Travis Lyle